Thursday, March 17, 2011

LADY GAGA - Born This Way (Cover)

Hello to my bloggy friends! Yes, we've reached the two year mark. We are now at 25 months since ICAB approval. To be honest, I never thought we would have to wait this long. The twenty-four month mark was pretty my mind, I was so sure we would receive a referral before we reached the two year mark. When we started the adoption process, they told us the longest we would have to wait after ICAB approval was twenty-four months. Of course, circumstances have changed. Certain issues with ICAB that are beyond our control have increased the wating time considerably for all future adoptive parents!! It's very frustrating. It has made me feel powerless...and it is a big test of patience and faith for both Raphael and myself. For me it means learning to let go and to just trust that whatever life throws at us, we can handle it. Things will go the way they are meant to go...even if I don't understand the reasons behind it now, who am I to question the path that God has seemingly chosen for us?! (destiny, or whatever you want to call it...)
Okay, so this isn't how I planned things...this isn't how I envisioned or imagined my life growing up...but that doesn't mean this isn't the right path. This is the true sense of "going with the flow."
I have to trust that it will all work out in the end. I have no control over this...and that's probably the hardest part to accept! My mantra for the adoption process, and for life in general (the Serenity Prayer): God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.

It's been a while since I've posted anything...mostly because the wait has been so long, and there just hasn't been much news on the adoption front! Basically, we're still waiting. Patiently, most of the time! Some days I feel very discouraged and wonder if it's ever really going to happen...will the phone actually ring one day with the news that we've been matched and that we finally have a referral?! Will our turn ever really come? It just doesn't feel real yet. We've been waiting for so long, and it feels like we're not a step further than we were three years ago when we started this process. I know this isn't actually the case, but sometimes it feels that way.

We try to keep our lives going and we don't let the adoption stop us from doing the things we want to do. We are keeping busy with lots of different projects. For example, we are making plans to go on vacation in Italy for three weeks this summer. It's very hard to make plans though, not knowing when we'll have to drop everything and travel to the Philippines to bring home our little one. Still, it could be another eight months (nearly enough time for a full-term pregnancy...I'm very aware of this fact!) before we hear anything...I don't want to just sit around and wait for the phone to ring either! We have to go on with our lives and live our life to the fullest...
So...we made tentative plans for this summer, booked our flights to Italy...and remain flexible, open-minded and ready to change our plans at the last minute as need be. It's the best that we can do at this point.

On a more positive note, we did get some news from the Philippines right after the Christmas holidays. We received an e-mail from ICAB asking us for an update. So, we contacted our Psychologist back in Amos, the one who did our original report, and had him update our file. We made a little photo album to send to the Philippines as well. It felt good to be doing something concrete and productive towards the adoption. Now, we sit back and wait...

I saw this video of Maria, a sweet little Filipino girl singing a new Lady Gaga song. I like the message of the song, which is basically that you're beautiful the way you are. It's a song about loving and accepting oneself. She's so adorable! What a cutie...and so talented! Makes me wish for a little Filipino girl :)

Of course, boy or doesn't really matter to us. Either way, we will be very happy! We just want the phone to ring and finally receive our referral! We are so fact, Raph and I have been ready for the last two years!! Yes, our lives will be changed forever...and we're probably not as ready to become parents as we'd like to think...but we sure are ready to give it a try! Something tells me no parent, biological or adoptive, really knows what they're getting into until they actually have kids. I don't want to sound whiny...that's not very becoming or mature...still, I can't help wondering, when will it be our turn?!


  1. Hi Amber, it's so good to hear from you again!! I really hope that you guys hear something soon but I do think it's a great idea to have other things on your plate to keep you busy. We found out about our referral when we were on a cruise to the Bahamas. Before booking the cruise I was wondering if we should or shouldn't be going but once we booked it, it gave me something to look forward to and to plan for. It really helped us to relax. Then day 2 into our trip, we found out about our little boy, Rafael!!! We totally enjoyed that trip because we then knew it would be our last trip alone for a very long time. So you should definitely plan a trip to Italy and totally enjoy it. I wish we could go to Italy too!! In the future hopefully. I will pray that you are matched soon! Take care.

  2. Hi Renee,
    I'm so happy for you and Brian! Your Rafael seems like such a cutie. A handful, but a sweet boy :) Enjoy every moment with him...everyone tells me that it just goes by too fast!!
    If you guys ever decide to travel to Montreal, or to Italy...let me know! My parents have a Villa in Tuscany, near Sinalunga, and we try to go in the summer when we can.
    It would be really fun to meet up in Italy in the future :) Thanks for the prayers and well wishes. Take care!

  3. I hope you receive your referal soon!! I love this song too!

  4. Amber, I'm with Renee! Plan that trip and have a blast. Because, once that call comes in and you bring your child home! It all changes drastically! It's been the best ride ever! But it's crazy busy with no longer just two but THREE! It's a whole other ballgame!!! I love ITALY! Please go!!! Renee and I will live vicariously through you. Please post pics on FB...and we will see them in between poopy diapers!!!

  5. Ezekiel just sat and smiled at this video while it was playing. Thanks for posting it, she is amazing! Thinking of you with this incredibly long hard wait. You ladies with the long waits are rock stars in my opinion!!

  6. So glad to see an update on you guys. Yes, I know it is so hard, especially when you feel like nothing is new...just continuing to wait. But soon, you will be posting like Renee and Brian about how your little one has already been home 1 month. Trust me, those months will fly by. :) And yes, take a trip, because once we had kids, a trip or vacation to us is to McDonald's. Ha!

  7. I was just searching the web for Philippines adoption info and found your blog! We got our match call just 6 weeks ago from the Philippines after waiting just over 2 years from our ICAB approval. The whole process took us 3 years! I thought it would never happen, either. We have two girls, 6 and 8, and had applied for 2 boys. We were matched with one boy, 15 months old and couldn't be more thrilled.

    It is soooo hard to keep living your life, always knowing that you don't want to plan too far in advance just in case....

    I have to say, that the hardest part of the process is this waiting to travel. I know my son is across the world and there is nothing I can do to get him any faster. We were supposed to get his legal documents after 30 days, and it has already been 7 weeks. I just keep checking e-mail and praying everyday that we will get the notification.

    I pray that just the right child will come to be a part of your family quickly! Just know that I understand.

  8. Hi, I've been reading some of your posts and I see that you and your husband are adopting in the Philippines. The wait is very long indeed. 2 years? I like reading your blog including Renee and Brian and the db family because it interests me that you guys are adopting in my country. Thank you for processing an adoption in the Philippines.

  9. Thanks for sharing your feelings. Waiting is definitely the hardest part. You sound like you are trying very hard to be positive and live day to day. Hang in there...your day will be coming. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  10. i know that it will happen....i know that it will...god bless you amber and your husband for your interest to adopt a filipino child.

  11. Yes, continue to stay busy and soon enough you will be crazy BUSY with a new member to the family. I wish I had words that made your wait easier, but unfortunately I don't. Hang in there, you have such a positive outlook on it all.